BOO!

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Ghosting – the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication.

I don’t quite understand ghosting somebody, especially as an adult. As a teenager, people come and go all the time with no warning. Not that big of a deal. As an adult, you would think they would have a maturity level high enough to know that it’s rude and stupid.

However, I see it being done all the time. Like, are you not grown up enough just come out and be honest? Trust me, that will get you much farther in life than just avoiding things. That is what “ghosting” really is: Avoidance.

You don’t have to go into great detail, or any detail, about why you lost interest. Just let them know that you aren’t feeling it. If they do ask for reasons, give it to them. You can be honest without being disrespectful. Don’t get me wrong, there are some people that can’t take a hint or can’t just hear “I’m not interested” and let it be and still hold out extremely high hopes and just keep pursuing it. But, don’t just assume that everybody else is like that.

Another thing about ghosting I don’t get is when the person doing the ghosting started the whole thing anyways. Especially when you haven’t even actually gone out. I mean, did they offend you in a way that was so bad that you couldn’t just talk about it?

Being the age I am, I see it happening to people I know way too often and I have had it happen to me. Like, I just don’t get it. If I’m not interested in a person that has shown their interest in me, I have no problem being like “look, we can be friends but that is it”. They either are like “ok, cool” or they say “I’m not looking for a friend”. BOOM! Grown up conversation!

What is really bad is that I have even seen people do it to friends. I understand we are all busy and communication does tend to fall short, but if you have been talking with somebody as friends, or more than friends, don’t just stop responding. Talk about leaving them hanging.

I guess moral of the story is grow up people!!

People

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You ever quit talking to somebody because you find them just a tad annoying. Then a few years later they cross your mind and you wonder if they were truly that bad or if you were just being a snob?

Then, they send you a friend request and you’re like “oh, hey, I’ll give ’em a 2nd chance.”

The conversation starts off normal, the how ya beens and what not are exchanged. However, within the first 30 seconds they say something slightly strange.

I get it, if you have kids you are proud of them, but don’t ask somebody you haven’t talked to in over a year if they want you to send them a picture of you and the kids. If they ask, feel free to send them whatever you want, but only if they ask or the conversation actually warrants it.

What makes this even better is when you don’t say yes, you just kind skirt around the question. Yet, they send you a picture anyways and then ask for one of you and your child.

Don’t get me wrong, I do somewhat know this person and they are a good person, it isn’t anything sick and twisted. It is just strange to randomly start a conversation off with that.

This is where you soon realize that no, you weren’t being a total snob, and yes, they do come on a little too strong. Now, you are already regretting that initial decision of accepting the friend request.

Oh boy, this has definitely been a day.

Water Everywhere

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You know you are in for an interesting day when you are the person in the office to find the massive water leak. It also helps knowing that you are going to be the only one in the office all day.

Good thing is the office is a city owned building.

“Yoooohoooo! Maintenance please.”

Glad it was making a noise!

I guess there are some good things about this. First, it happened in the middle of the week. Can’t imagine what we would have walked into if it had happened over the weekend.

Also, it is just the water heater. No busted pipes or anything like that so it should be an easy fix. The keyword here is “SHOULD”.

On another note, I am fairly accident prone. When I found the leak, my hands were full of water bottles that I was taking to the fridge when I heard the noise. The light was off so I didn’t notice the puddle on the floor until I stepped in it and heard the noise that made.

So, of course I start rushing around trying to figure out who I should call cause the boss is out of the office today and Co-Vid has everybody else working from home. You should know, there are only 4 of us total.

Once I got the call in to maintenance I went about my usual morning routine of heating up my poptart. I got them on the paper towel and somehow or another, when I turned to put the wrapper in the trash, I kind hyperextended my knee just a little.

I blame it on the adrenaline that kind of kicked in when from the leak. Needless to say I am not always the calmest under pressure. This I blame on the anxiety.

Outdoorsy

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When I first found out I was having a boy, I was excited! I was well prepared to teach him the football, baseball, basketball, and any other sport he may be interested in.

What made it even better was when he came out loving cars! We go to local dirt track every weekend and I love it! I’m one of those that if I had the money, I would be out there driving, but racing is an expensive sport!!!!

Now, what I was expecting and what I got are two different things. Yes, he loves football and basketball and the racing, but he also has developed a love for the outdoorsy type of sports. Ya know, hunting and fishing and that type of thing.

This is where my problem comes in. I didn’t grow up being taught all the finer details of these sports. I know about each a teensy bit and can appreciate it, but actually doing it and teaching it is high above my pay grade.

I have been able to kind of take him fishing with a kiddy pole and learned to set up the bobber and hook and the weights. The only thing is, I don’t like bugs so I just picked up some of those brightly colored nibblet things for bait.

The first trip out we were learning to cast by using the little rubber fish that comes with kiddy poles. We were doing good until something happened and the fish flew off without me realizing it. I ended up reeling all the line in and had no idea what to do.

I unscrewed the cap on the reel and thought I could fix it but couldn’t quite figure it out. That day a good friend came out and helped us. From then I did good with taking him to the park just me and the boy, until the same thing happened again. This time the good friend texted me each step to fix it.

This fall, after it started cooling off another friend who has a little boy that just turned 1 started meeting us at the park. Luckily they have a daddy around who just so happens to enjoy fishing too. Thanks to him we got to fish with actual worms. Still haven’t caught anything though.

One thing I have learned through this is that for those that truly enjoy fishing, poles set up to cast out and let sit until you get a bite is not the way to go. Zackary wants the experienced type of fishing, where ya throw it out and very slowly reel it back in and ya use lures and such, which I know nothing about!

It appears I am going to have to learn the real ins and outs of the outdoorsy life. Just last night the tot said we needed to go camping, which I have done before but not by myself!

This is going to be an interesting journey!

Ohhh Toddlers!

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Toddler years are some of the most interesting years of your life. And I don’t mean for the toddler.

In example, every now and then my son will come crawl into bed with me in the middle of the night. He doesn’t usually wake me up either. I don’t even know he is there until I somewhat wake up to roll over and there he is.

Now, he has been potty-trained for a few months now. He doesn’t need a pull-up anymore. But, there are still accidents every now and then. Ok, fine, that is part of having a toddler. The part I have a problem with is….most of his nighttime accidents seem to happen in MY bed.

Not his bed where the mattress is made for with accidents in mind. Where the wet spot doesn’t absorb into the mattress. Nope. My bed. My queen sized pillow top mattress that is NOT waterproof!

On another note, toddler years are interesting because you never know what you might find them doing.

One of my mom’s favorite events was one day we are sitting in the living room. The boy has his own little recliner and a table he eats on. He was eating cereal, and I look over and he has a Fred, from Scooby Doo, in his cereal. A toy Fred. So, with her being on her phone all she knows is that she randomly hears me say “Get Fred out of your cereal!”

Then there is what he was doing last night.

Here he is doing what looks like a normal thing. Eating some yogurt.

However, upon further inspection you find, he is doing a normal thing abnormally.

That is right, my son was using the handle end of a spoon to eat his yogurt. As you can see he knows the right way to use a spoon since that is how he started his yogurt and how he finished. But somewhere in between he chose to do things a little differently.

Oh the joy of toddlers!

“Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.”
— Psalm 127:3

It’s Been A Week…It’s Tuesday

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Yesterday started off like a it was going to be a Monday of all Mondays. The toddler got mad because I helped him pack his lunch box. By “help” I mean, I put his soft sided lunch box on the counter so he could put his stuff in it. From that point on he was grumpy. Not 15 minutes later, pulling into the school parking lot he was fine. Toddlers….sheesh!

I go to work as normal and at around 10 a co-worker notices a window is shattered. The whole front of our building is windows. This was a smaller one, at the bottom. All the windows are tinted so even though it shattered, it was still in place. Turns out it was shot with some sort BB gun. Also turns out, the building got shot 9 times with a BB gun. Thankfully it was over the weekend when nobody was in the office. I just can’t imagine what would make someone shoot up a random building….with a BB gun. All that BB gun did was put some holes in some windows.

Today, is Tuesday, and a new day. However, there was almost an incident at school drop-off this morning. While I walked my son up to the building, a lady parked next to me…crooked and too close. So close, I was blocked out of my own car. So, I took a quick picture so I could vent a little to my friends and family. Then, I wait. It was only about 10 minutes but when she came back she didn’t even acknowledge there was a human being standing there. Just got in her car. Now, if I were to park so close that the person couldn’t get into their car I would make an effort to let them know I was sorry. I would at least acknowledge that I know I did wrong and would act like a decent human being. This woman did nothing…until she saw me take a picture of her car as she waited to get in the exit line. Then, she blamed her crooked parking on the car on the other side of her. Now, I could have made a big scene but I just said alright and let it be. She gets back in her car and I hang back making sure she has room to pull out into the line. She doesn’t. She just sits there, so I go around her and get in line myself. She had her opportunities. Something about the drop-off and pick-up line really does bring out the worst in people.

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
–Proverbs 15:1

Be Positive

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Had car trouble again yesterday. As we were about to pull out of the McDonald’s parking lot, something busted. We heard a “spew” sound and saw smoke coming from under the hood. As I pulled into a parking spot I checked my gauges and everything was fine according to them. I get out and check under the hood and nothing seems to be broken but, there is something definitely leaking. Something with a smell. We call my grandmother to come get my mom and son to go on and take them home while I wait on a friend to come look at it. Within 5 minutes the problem is found. Luckily it’s a small fix. Just a plastic connector for the heater hose broke. No big deal, except that no average parts store seems to have one. Went the three different stores to find anything that would work enough to get me back home. So, two gallons of coolant, a hose clamp, and some vise grips later the tater is home. In all reality I did panic but as were trying to hunt down a connector a thought crossed my mind. It could have been worse. It could have been a major part go out but it was just a $5 part instead. Also, it was labor day so my friend was able to come help. If it hadn’t have happened yesterday evening, it probably would have happened this morning trying to drop off my son or on my way to work, when every body else is at work too. Another thing is how much I dislike driving my grandmother’s car. It’s a 2012 Focus, but compared to my 2006 X-terra, I feel like my butt is dragging the ground and the brakes are super touchy. Even just thinking about tapping them seems to almost throw you through the windshield. However, being optimistic means that I am grateful there is a car available for me to use until I can get the part I need. Obviously, not every situation is quite this easy to be positive about. However, the stress you feel during situations like these depends on you. You can choose to be positive or you can choose to be negative. Being negative will only bring stress and frustration. Who needs more of that? I certainly do NOT! Letting these things seep into your mind can make things seem never ending. Seeing the good times in between the bad times becomes nearly impossible. It starts to make your life seem like nothing but struggles and heartache. When really, you just need to change the focus of your story. Now, I am no mechanic but, if I hadn’t immediately gone into panic mode about how much this was going to cost if it was the a/c compressor or the radiator, I would have seen the problem. A hose disconnected. It’s like when you think you are charging your phone to come and find out the cord has disconnected from the square plug in. You freak out at first and then you find there was no reason to actually lose your mind. Just a small disconnect.

12 “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
–Philippians 4:12-13

The Car Line

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With school starting back up, one thing that annoys me the most are the people in the car line that can’t follow simple norms. The people that cause the most problems are those going to the elementary. So, a few details for you to have a visual. The elementary parking lot is also the entrance to the middle school. There are 3 lanes, The outer right hand lane is for middle school drop off , the middle lane is elementary drop off which actually splits in two (this is also where the leaving line from middle school merges with the leaving line from elementary), and the third is the leaving line. The leaving line moves pretty good. The other two are hit or miss. Now I have to add one little area where the elementary drop off line splits in two there is a space for those having to park and walk their children in to not be stuck in the line. This little space is just big enough for one car because back when the parking lot was first built over 30 years ago, it was just another row of parking spots. Usually those parking pull in this way and then get in the leaving line to actually leave. However, sometimes you get the person who tries to leave through it. Now, not only are they blocking the way in, they have now added a third party where the leaving lines merge. When there are just two merging everyone behaves, takes turns, and it moves pretty good. Now you have this random third car blocking the way for incoming parkers and now know one can figure out whose turn it is to go. So, us parkers are now having to get in the drop off line that split from the main branch. Now we are stuck and the people behind us are too. Once we get to open spots we should be fine. However, this change in routine seems to throw a lot of people off and now they pull in and take up 2 FREAKING SPOTS!! I’m not talking they are just over the line a little bit. No, their butt is in one spot and their nose is in the other! These are people I see everyday parked in just about the same spots just fine, like a normal person. But no, their routine was broken and now they have lost all capability to function.

See the 3 lanes. Leaving lane to the left, elementary in the middle, and middle school to the right.
Note: The “point of split” is where the Leaving lines merge also.



Now, there is another rule breaker I want to talk about. The ones that are going to the elementary and are technically in the driveway but they it is backed up and they just can’t wait. Usually this specific occurrence is in the afternoon for pickup. School lets out at 3:05 and if you get there before or right at that time, there is going to be a line. These impatient people are the ones that, even school JUST let out and the cars in the leaving line are pretty spaced out, they decide to drive up the leaving lane, passing the cars in front of them. The problem is, you can’t always see the cars coming and you end up in a face off. Now, everybody is stuck. Even if you have to park, you can’t actually pick up your kid until 3:05 so why you in such a hurry anyways.

Yes, we know this is a hot mess and could use some adjusting. It has been this way for YEARS and if you would just follow “rules” it actually all goes smoothly!


“To every rule there is an exception—and an idiot ready to demonstrate it. Don’t be the one!”
― Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration

Mind Ya Business, Again!

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Working for a non-profit you see all sorts of people. The ones I dislike the most are the ones all up in somebody else’s business. Yes, we currently are accepting applications for a specific assistance and anyone in affected areas are able to apply. But, don’t look at what your neighbor 3 doors down got and assume you’re getting the exact same thing. That isn’t how it works. Don’t come in here like you know the damage they have just because you know their general situation. You yourself told us the story of their daily struggles, which by the way are completely legit struggles. You also said that you were proud of you neighborhood because it recently came together to help this family. So, how dare you stand here acting all nice and empathetic while trying to plant a seed in our minds that THEY cheated the system. YOU. DON’T. KNOW. Even if they did, what’s done is done. We can’t take money back. Like I said, we are a local NON-PROFIT, not the cops. Yes, it sucks if they did cheat the system a little, but it isn’t like they are hooligans that just don’t want to work. They actually need help, and the seasonal weather probably didn’t help matters. Instead of focusing on what your neighbors got, focus on your needs and what you will get.

In no way do I want to seem like I’m condoning cheating the system. However, it isn’t anybody else’s business, so just stay out of it.

“Like one who grabs a stray dog by the ears is someone who rushes into a quarrel not their own.”
— Proverbs 26:19

“And in fact, you do love all of God’s family throughout Macedonia. Yet we urge you, brothers and sisters, to do so more and more, 11 and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you,”
— 1 Thessalonians 4:10-11

Day Two!

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The kiddo’s first day of school went good. He didn’t come home in the clothes he left in, but I honestly believe that may have been mostly my bad. So, their schedule has them going straight to nap after going outside. With it being summer in the south, they do get a drink before naptime. Teacher said he tried so hard but just didn’t make it in time. This where my fault comes in. I had a couple of thoughts yesterday morning while getting him ready. I knew I should not have put actual button-up shorts on him, but I did it anyway. Just an FYI, if your mom instinct is telling you something, you should probably listen to it! So today he is wearing his normal elastic band shorts. Here is to hoping he comes home the way he left!

Another thing about him starting school is how worried I was. My son has always been a shy kid. He didn’t really talk much outside the house. About two years ago now, he was evaluated and started going to speech therapy. After about a year he got evaluated for physical and occupational too. I cannot tell you how much it has helped! He is almost like a whole different kid. Now, he walks up and lets them take his temperature, (thank you COVID) and walks right in with the lady taking him to his class. Again, thank you COVID for not letting me walk my own son to his class. But, he does it willingly, and happily! Last year I wanted him to start pre-k so bad because it would cheaper for this mama. But, now I think it was better he didn’t get to go. Sometimes, the things we want to happen the most aren’t what is planned for us.

“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.”
— Proverbs 16:9