Tag Archives: Philippians

Be Positive

Had car trouble again yesterday. As we were about to pull out of the McDonald’s parking lot, something busted. We heard a “spew” sound and saw smoke coming from under the hood. As I pulled into a parking spot I checked my gauges and everything was fine according to them. I get out and check under the hood and nothing seems to be broken but, there is something definitely leaking. Something with a smell. We call my grandmother to come get my mom and son to go on and take them home while I wait on a friend to come look at it. Within 5 minutes the problem is found. Luckily it’s a small fix. Just a plastic connector for the heater hose broke. No big deal, except that no average parts store seems to have one. Went the three different stores to find anything that would work enough to get me back home. So, two gallons of coolant, a hose clamp, and some vise grips later the tater is home. In all reality I did panic but as were trying to hunt down a connector a thought crossed my mind. It could have been worse. It could have been a major part go out but it was just a $5 part instead. Also, it was labor day so my friend was able to come help. If it hadn’t have happened yesterday evening, it probably would have happened this morning trying to drop off my son or on my way to work, when every body else is at work too. Another thing is how much I dislike driving my grandmother’s car. It’s a 2012 Focus, but compared to my 2006 X-terra, I feel like my butt is dragging the ground and the brakes are super touchy. Even just thinking about tapping them seems to almost throw you through the windshield. However, being optimistic means that I am grateful there is a car available for me to use until I can get the part I need. Obviously, not every situation is quite this easy to be positive about. However, the stress you feel during situations like these depends on you. You can choose to be positive or you can choose to be negative. Being negative will only bring stress and frustration. Who needs more of that? I certainly do NOT! Letting these things seep into your mind can make things seem never ending. Seeing the good times in between the bad times becomes nearly impossible. It starts to make your life seem like nothing but struggles and heartache. When really, you just need to change the focus of your story. Now, I am no mechanic but, if I hadn’t immediately gone into panic mode about how much this was going to cost if it was the a/c compressor or the radiator, I would have seen the problem. A hose disconnected. It’s like when you think you are charging your phone to come and find out the cord has disconnected from the square plug in. You freak out at first and then you find there was no reason to actually lose your mind. Just a small disconnect.

12 “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
–Philippians 4:12-13

Guilt

Being a single mother can be one of the hardest things a woman can go through. Sometimes the hardest thing to deal with isn’t the tempting attitudes, the potty training, or tantrums. It’s the guilt that comes along with being the only parent. Me being a mom of a little boy, it breaks my heart when I see his friends doing things with their dad that I can’t do with him. It is in these moments that I actually wish he had a decent father. I tend to blame myself for that, as it was my poor choices that led this.

In these times, I remind myself that God has everything under control. Having a church family means that we take care of each other. The men that my son sees and is learning from isn’t his violent, and angry father, but rather Godly men that see He doesn’t have a man. These are the men that take interest and don’t leave him out. They offer to do things with him so he doesn’t miss out and can join the fun. God knew my son would be watching and replaced a toxic father with better role models. Men who know how to live a godly life and what that truly means. I couldn’t be more thankful to these men. Dads of his friends, friends of mine, all the men that doesn’t see broken family, but men who see a little boy that will need something to look up to as he grows in age and spiritual awareness.

Being a single mom you always have to be aware of the people you surround yourself with. You can try and teach them the right ways but for you to successfully do that you need to live the right life. You need the people you surround yourself with to live the right life as well. Whatever your child sees you taking part in they learn that behavior, those habits you may have, are okay. This is where the cycle of broken homes begins. If your child sees men tearing you down and living the ungodly life, that is what they will believe is right. This is what they will settle for or settle being when they come of age.

Always remember, if you ask God for help He is willing to give it. So, ask Him for help in guiding your sons to be good men. Ask Him to guide your daughters into seeing how a good man should treat her. If God took someone out of your, or you child’s life, it was for a good reason. We don’t know all of God’s reasons and we don’t need to. He has the answers, He has what we need. Him and only Him.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
–Philippians 4:6-7